I was tagged to write eight things about myself and then tag eight more people. Unfortunately the only people i could tag already tagged me, but i thought that i would send out my eight things anyway.
WELCOME TO MY WORLD..........
1. I wish that i was as strong as I make myself out to be. I wish I had more faith in myself to make the right decision. I always second guess myself and continuously worry that the choices i have made are wrong. That includes groceries for meals i want to cook and whether i should have bought a shirt i needed for work.
2. I am scared of thunderstorms and car accidents. I don't know if it is the big bangs or the threat of being hurt and the earth crumbling down on me or just what will happen if the TV gets ruined by the storm. It is kind of weird to explain but when it storms I will always curl up in a ball and cuddle a pillow and pray that the lights stay on. When driving I always am careful about other drivers and am constantly running scenarios through my brain of ways to move out of the way if someone skids or brakes quickly in front of me. I also always pull off to the side when someone is braking sharply in front of me so that the person behind me knows to pay attention and that the person in front of me has stopped. Also semi trucks scare the crap out of me. Anytime I pass a semi on the road I white knuckle it until I have passed them.
3. I have never done illegal drugs. I have been in a room twice when they are being smoked but left as soon as I possibly could. I have seen so many people taken down by lots of different substances and never understood how they could consume someone's life. I guess I can't judge until I have witnessed it first hand. I don't however have the need to go out and prove the point. I guess the threat of being caught is enough to keep me away. Not to mention the rath of my father and his disappointed eyes.
4. I don't like surprises. I like to recieve gifts but I like to know what they are. That is somewhat why I buy my own presents. I like to plan things and know what is going on every step of the way. I always have more than one plan too. I like to surprise other people and purchase or make things that are meaningful for them. I always try really really hard to give and do things for others that can be remembered as something that made their day great.
5. I am maticulous about having a clean home. I think that my home portrays the type of person that I am and taking care of my home I feel makes me look like the type of person who takes care of their belongings and themself. If I don't clean I feel lazy and like I didn't try to be my best that day. Plus doesn't it make you feel better to have a clean house. You can look around and feel better cause it is nice and sparkling. I wonder if that is a girly thing or if it is just bread into us. The reason I wonder is because guys are never like that.
6. I have never had a true best friend for a long period of time. Don't get me wrong I have always wanted to have that one friend that you can share the past with and share the war stories. Someone who has stood through everything with you. The one person I can say has done that with/for me is my sister. I class her as my best friend but as she is family I don't know if she can really be in that category. I have never had a friend I met in school and continued to keep in touch with.
7. I cherish my family and will always put them before anything in this world. There is nobody in this world that I will care for as much as I care for my family. I also include my fiance in my family as I would take a bullet for him. He can drive me crazy just like any member of my immediate family but keeping these people close to my heart is my number one priority. Even though my family is so spread apart I will always know that no matter what they will be there for me and me for them. I watch movies and cry like a baby through any sad or happy scenes when family is involved. The kindness and compasion that we have for each other is rarely found. I know that if we had to get together to build a house it would be a disaster and nothing would get done but when someone is in need of help or just a kind word we bind together like a cacoon. I love my family and wouldn't trade them for the world.
8. I want to be 120 lbs again and feel good about walking through a crowd. I want to be noticed. Maybe it is because I don't get a lot of attention here at home but I would love to carve myself a perfect body and keep it that way without starving myself or surgery. I know that not all of us are blessed with barbie doll characteristics but it would sure be nice. I would never want to create a world for myself where beauty is only skin deep but to be able to wake up in the morning and be beautiful will always be something I wish I could have. I am very happy about my job and new choice of career and my home decor and my lack of being able to cook and I don't know why looks matter but I still would like to be noticed.
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